Ever Answer Public Telephones When They Ring?

Do you ever answer public telephones when they ring?

Yesterday in Glasgow’s South Side,
Anna and me were waiting on the train at Crossmyloof station when the phone on the wall rang.

Me, I pretty much always answer public phones if they start ringing in the hope of getting myself getting caught up in some sort of “Phonebooth” scenario just like Colin Farrell.

Turns out I wasn’t too far off this time because when I picked the phone up a high pitched voice said:

“I’m on top of the building behind you.
I have a sniper trained on the back of your fucking head”.

So there’s me looking at the building behind me when the voice says:
“Would you like to touch my penis?”

AHAHA!
I was busy laughing and repeating what the voice was saying aloud to Anna and two other women who were sitting beside us when it then says:

“Don’t you dare get on that train.
There are people on the way to smash your fucking face with baseball bats”.

Ha Ha!
Kids today eh?
The cheeky wee scamps.

I’m off to see if I’m on youtube.

What Can Possibly Go Wrong?

It was definately a strange day I had.

There was me sitting in the office waiting.
Waiting like I’ve waited so many times for the teacher to come in and have words with me about my attitude and future.

Except!
It’s not the 1990’s and I’m not about to be told off for swearing in class or setting that piano on fire by accident or refusing to wear the stupid school uniform because it clashed with my cool black suede coat or anything like that.

Nope.
Those days are long gone now but oddly enough,
I’m waiting on the same teacher who used to have to tell me off for all those things back in school all those years ago…

Eddie Morrison: My old English and form teacher.

Eddie’s a Headteacher now at a school in Hamilton.
You couldn’t meet a nicer, dedicated, more caring feller.
He hasn’t changed a bit since i knew him.
Sometimes Eddie’s classes were the only reason I even bothered to show up for school.

Beginning this week,
I’ll be working with some of the pupils at Eddie’s school on an English/Illustration project that we’ve been secretly putting together since January.

The idea is:
The pupils write their own original stories with a view to illustrating them and I take things from there in the form of various workshops.

What can possibly go wrong.

So,
Things might get quiet on here over the next week or two whilst I’m working on that but I’ll try and post some updates on here whenever I can.

It’ll be strange going back to school.

Maybe I’ll even get to utter the famous lines said many a time to me by Eddie:

“You’re only ruining it for yourself!”

Heh heh 🙂