A Wee Sad Story About A Space Invader…

This has been doing the rounds at my work and I thought I’d share it up on here.
T’would bring a tear to a glass eye…










Quality Food Poisoning.

Anna noticed the sign but for me, it was too late…

Homesick For A Place That Ain’t Even Home.

So that’s me back from New York City.
I took several big bites outta The Big Apple and it tastes sweet!

I was over there for only one week and it went past in lightning time.
This was my 3rd time over there and now it’s all over.

I’ve got the ‘came back from New York 2 days ago’ blues.
I’m bluer than Joni Mitchell’s blue face on the cover of her album “Blue“, playing the blues on a blue guitar from Picasso’s blue period with my face painted blue in front row seats watching Blue Man Group whilst punching Anthony Costa‘s face in šŸ˜¦

One day you’re standing on the corner of 34th and 8th then…WHOOSH!
Next thing you know you’re standingĀ in the middle ofĀ Duke Street with aĀ what the hell just happened look on your face.

I’m tired as hell.
I’ve pretty much been up for a whole week and 3 hours after my plane landed back in Glasgow,
I went out on the town to see the terrifying stand up comedy of Jerry Sadowitz.

Needless to say I had the time of my life over in New York.
It feels like home more than home feels like home.
Out all day doing all kinds of interesting things and tearing the town up at night,
I know my way around NYC better than I know my way around here.

I kept a diary in New York which ended up being pretty long.
I wrote it in bars and cafes at night as I wandered around looking for the kind of New York you see in Scorsese films and the good news is that I found it!
I also took around 1500 photographs and met some great people…BUT!
I’m gonna have to tell you all about it later.
I’ll get it typed up and post it all up on here over the next week or so.

So here I am feeling homesick for a place that’s ain’t even my home.
Maybe one day it will be.

Orlasaurus.


You probably can’t tell but as I was taking these photos of my Niece Orla,
She was making the exact same soundsĀ as the Velociraptor’s in Jurassic Park.

She does that quite a lot.
That’s what she does.

What Can Possibly Go Wrong?

It was definately a strange day I had.

There was me sitting in the office waiting.
Waiting like I’ve waited so many times for the teacher to come in and have words with me about my attitude and future.

Except!
It’s not the 1990’s and I’m not about to be told off for swearing in class or settingĀ that piano on fire by accident or refusing to wear the stupid school uniform because it clashed with my cool black suede coat or anything like that.

Nope.
Those days are long gone now but oddly enough,
I’m waiting on the same teacher who used to have to tell me off for all those things back in school all those years ago…

Eddie Morrison: My old English and form teacher.

Eddie’s a Headteacher now at a school in Hamilton.
You couldn’t meet a nicer, dedicated, more caring feller.
He hasn’t changed a bit since i knew him.
Sometimes Eddie’s classes were the only reason I even bothered to show up for school.

Beginning this week,
I’ll be working with some of the pupils at Eddie’s school on an English/Illustration project that we’ve been secretly putting together since January.

The idea is:
The pupils write their own original stories with a view to illustrating them and I take things from there in the form of various workshops.

What can possibly go wrong.

So,
Things might get quiet on here over the next week or two whilst I’m working on that but I’ll try and post some updates on here whenever I can.

It’ll be strange going back to school.

Maybe I’ll even get to utter the famous lines said many a time to me by Eddie:

“You’re only ruining it for yourself!”

Heh heh šŸ™‚

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