And A Big Creepy Bisexual Torso In A Pear Tree!

Hi folks,
Merry Christmas 2010!

I have here, a beer and a coffin sized box of Malteasers.
I’m relaxing y’know?
After all, I’ve been busy all month.

Know what else I have here?

THIS:

Yup.
A big life sized, creepy, anatomically correct, bisexual torso.

WHAT THE HELL ELSE WOULD I HAVE!?

It’s in the corner of the room just now,
Just…sort of staring at me with it’s weird one eye.

My Sister always gets me interesting gifts at Christmas time.

Can anyone top that in terms of weirdness?