The Vines Of Brittany Furlan!

I gave up watching TV a while ago because frankly, it’s bollocks. All of it.

I turned to Vine and found Brittany Furlan straight away and she’s now my favourite person on the entire internet. Actually, I’m probably in love with her! But anyway…

Brittany’s built up a massive fanbase by making amazingly funny Vine videos and the best part is that she is completely fucking one hundred per cent off her head MAD! The best people always are, aren’t they?

You can check out Brittany’s Vine profile HERE. These are some of my favourites so far…

You May Also Be Interested In…
* What REALLY Happened At The Emmys With Brittany Furlan
* Max Koch: “Cheetos With Bobby & Al (Al Pacino / Robert De Niro)
* Home Decorating: Ed Gein Style

“The Local Stigmatic” (1990).

Here is your chance to see Al Pacino’s very rarely seen film, “The Local Stigmatic“. It’s particularly interesting as Pacino tries his hand at a…Cockney accent!

From Wikipedia:
The Local Stigmatic is a film directed by David Wheeler and produced by and starring Al Pacino. It was filmed and edited during the late 1980s. It had a showing at the Museum of Modern Art in New York City in March 1990, but was never released theatrically. It was released on DVD as part of “The Al Pacino Box Set” in June 2007. The film is 56 minutes long. It follows the story of two British friends who spend their time walking about London discussing dog track racing. The Local Stigmatic is based on a stage play by Heathcote Williams.”

From Rotten Tomatoes:
“Two working-class Englishmen spend their free time arguing about greyhound-racing and Winston Churchill. They also read the papers, especially the gossip columns and Society pages. In a bar one day, they meet a film star who they’ve read about, and subject him to a savage, and apparently motiveless, beating.”


Some Trivia For “The Local Stigmatic” Courtesy Of The IMDB:
* Al Pacino donated a copy to the Museum of Modern Art with the stipulation that it can only be shown with his permission. A small number of screenings have taken place since 1990. The film was not widely released until June 2007.

* Al Pacino and Paul Guilfoyle studied and examined the play for four years before they decided to make a film of it. When they finally decided to film it they spent four months rehearsing before it was finally shot. They approached the production of the film as if they were staging a play and wanted to avoid making it look too much like a film. Pacino deleted any shots looked too cinematic for his taste.

* Al Pacino, producer Michael Hadge and Joseph Maher co-starred in an Off-Broadway stage production of “The Local Stigmatic” in 1969.

* Filmed in 9 days.

* Legendary theatre producer and friend of Al Pacino, Joseph Papp was upset with Pacino for getting the film rights before he did. For many years, Papp had wanted to produce a film version of the play.

* Al Pacino began shooting exteriors for the film in 1984 while was in London doing a stage production of “American Buffalo”.

* Al Pacino strongly considered releasing the film after the success of Pulp Fiction because it is also about two nihilists.

* Director David F. Wheeler wanted Al Pacino to wear glasses throughout the film but Pacino did not want to. So they compromised by having Pacino’s character wear glasses only when he was reading.

* There are several different versions of the film since Al Pacino has continued to re-edit the film over the years.

You May Also Be Interested In…
* Max Koch: Cheetos With AL & BOBBY
* Max Koch: AL & Bobby Do The Laundry

Mouse Trapping In The Hood.

Ever since I had mice in my previous flat 2 years ago, I’ve been obsessed with reading about the little buggers. Although mice are no longer a problem for me, I do feel guilty from time to time about the 8 or so I killed and since I’m completely clued up on them these days, I even sort of admire mice. They ain’t stupid. That’s for sure.

Whilst reading some user submitted mouse stories on Reddit, I came across this one particular story that made me laugh myself silly whilst terrifying and horrifying me at the same time!

Obviously written by some sort of Commando psychopath who has had enough, here it is…

ok, a bit of a long read but worth it. true story.

i used to live in an apartment in the hood and i had a miniature doberman pincher that would keep the mice at bay. after my dog passed away at 14/15 yrs old i took a summer long vacation to take my mind off of things.

when i came back i realized the first night how much the dog was doing to keep the mice away… as i had an infestation of mice. literally hundreds of mice (from the entire building) had sought refuge in my apartment.

being in the hood the slumlord landlord didnt give 2 fucks about it and told me to just lay out some traps.

the second night back i had mice running across my bed…across my chest and across my face as i tried to sleep. as they had got used to run of the entire place while i was gone.

i snapped and got out my air rifle. and sat up late at night perched on a stool in the corner of the room with my air rifle and would snipe the bastards till the sun came up.

i would go in the kitchen and sit on the stove and snipe the bastards as they went around the area where the dog food used to be at.

i learned the patterns that they would run (for example…behind the stove…to behind the dinning table… to behind the fridge… to a hole in the corner. they would run from cover to cover to avoid getting shot.

little fuckers where smart and learned the sound of a safety being “clicked” so i had to have my gun ready and just sit and wait with safety off and aimed at where i thought they were going to run. they learned the sound of bb’s rattling so they would hide if they heard that (so i adjusted and switched to pellets…arrowhead kind).

they learned that when the light was on in a room it meant i could be watching so they stop coming out before 1 am if the lights were on. (i adjusted and got nightvision googles from my uncle in the army)

the bigger mice (not rats, just big ass mice) would send out the little ones to do a “run” as i called it. basically they would run back and forth 3-4 times to draw any fire. if i didnt shoot, they assumed it was safe and then the big ones would come out. if i shot the “little ones” you wouldnt see the “big ones” for a couple of days.

after about 3-4 months of killing on average 15-20 mice a night, they finally got the message or finally all got killed off because i finally had my place rodent free. the first week i would kill about 30-40 a night.

TL/DR: slumlord landlord didnt give a shit about the mice infestation forcing me to go ‘full metal jacket’ on them and thus murdering hundreds of mice over a few months period.”

You May Also Be Interested In…
* Rest In Pieces
* Fucking Beetlejuice

Al Cook’s “Necropolis”: Please Give Blood.

Hi folks, this is the latest entry in my macabre Glaswegian comic-strip, Al Cook’s “Necropolis”.
It’s called “Please Give Blood” so please do!

As always, the main place to view Al Cook’s “Necropolis” in all of its complete and black biro penned, sinister hand-drawn wonder is HERE.

* Footnote:
I sent this “Please Give Blood” strip off to the Scottish National Blood Transfusion Service asking them to get behind the comic etc… and they said:

Hi Al,
Many thanks for your enquiry.
I’m afraid this is something we will not be able to support.
Best regards,

Leigh Taylor.
Donor Recruitment and Publicity Officer
Scottish National Blood Transfusion Service
25 Shelley Road
G12 0XB
Tel: 0141 357 7740“.

That aside, please do give blood. It’s very very important and not painful at all.

* Give Blood For Scotland
* Al Cook’s “Necropolis”

You May Also Be Interested In:
* Cut Loose (Complete Version)
* Cracking Open A Cold One

“Please Give Blood”: A Preview.

Hi folks,
I’ve decided to push back the new “Please Give Blood” instalment of my comic strip to Halloween 2012 because:
(a) I’m putting an animation video together.
(b) I’ve sent the strip off to the Scottish National Blood Donation & Transfusion Centre for their disapproval and as soon as I get their rejection/objection letter, I’m gonna work it into the plot.

You understand don’t you?
Until then, here is a link to the preview illustrations…

The strip will appear on Halloween 2012 right HERE.
Become a fan on Facebook HERE and follow me on Twitter HERE and I’ll follow you in real life!

*Disclaimer: Will contain blood. LOADS OF IT!

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