Eye Tests Have Changed A Lot Since I Was Wee.

It used to be that I’d dread getting my eyes tested. This was because I knew I couldn’t see properly and I knew that the optician would probably notice this and I’d have to wear stupid glasses for the rest of my life. It’s tough being 6.

To stop this from happening, I’d try to memorise as much of the eye chart as possible on my way in to the room because it was pinned up right by the door. It worked for a wee while but soon I was rumbled and that was me prescribed glasses.

I remember the optician saying “You have astigmatism. That means that one of your eyes is shaped like a rugby ball instead of a football, young man. Do you like football?”. I hated that guy. And then he said, “Wear these glasses when you’re at school and when you’re reading and you probably won’t even need them at all as an adult.”

I threw them in a hedge a few days later.

I need to wear glasses all the time now. I cannae see for shit and looking at the sky on an overcast day is torture even with tints.

I went for an eye test yesterday and was amazed at the technological advances even though it’s only been two years since I was last checked.

When they shone light into my eyes I saw blood going through my blood vessels in my eyes. I’d never seen that before. It was like tripping. I told the optician, “I wish I had a photo of what I can see right now.”

It was impossible to get a photo of what I was seeing, of course. However, I did get the two pictures they took of my eyeballs.

Here they are here >>>

NAVIS-Lite Print manager : NAVIS-SERVER

NAVIS-Lite Print manager : NAVIS-SERVER

Published in: on August 2, 2016 at 09:47  Leave a Comment  
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Book Cover Photograph News! “The Red Road” By Denise Mina Is Available Now!

Last year I managed to get one of my photographs selected for the cover of the paperback edition of “The Red Road” by Denise Mina. remember? I wrote about it HERE.

The Red Road

It’s still beyond me why the publishers didn’t use a picture of Glasgow’s Red Road Flats or at the very least, a red road, but I’m still happy to have one of my photos on one of Denise Mina’s books.

This is how the book looks:

denise-mina

This was my original photo:

original

You can buy the book straight from the publishers HERE.
Or from Amazon HERE.
Read an extract from the book HERE.

There’s a pretty good interview with Denise Mina HERE.

That’s all for now, and remember, never judge a book by it’s cover!
See you on the bookshelves.

You May Also Be Interested In…
* Album Cover Artwork: “Love Lust Tales”
* Album Cover Artwork: “A Circus Of Vaginas”
* Al Cook’s “Necropolis”

“Please Give Blood”: A Preview.

Hi folks,
I’ve decided to push back the new “Please Give Blood” instalment of my comic strip to Halloween 2012 because:
(a) I’m putting an animation video together.
(b) I’ve sent the strip off to the Scottish National Blood Donation & Transfusion Centre for their disapproval and as soon as I get their rejection/objection letter, I’m gonna work it into the plot.

You understand don’t you?
Until then, here is a link to the preview illustrations…

The strip will appear on Halloween 2012 right HERE.
Become a fan on Facebook HERE and follow me on Twitter HERE and I’ll follow you in real life!

*Disclaimer: Will contain blood. LOADS OF IT!

Happy Easter Eggs!

Today being Easter, it got me thinking.

My life has been uncomplicated, guilt-free, rich and full ever since I renounced Jesus Christ and Catholicism when I was 12.
It was honestly and easily the best decision I ever made in my life kids!

Happy Easter to you and yours!
Please enjoy these Lovely Eggs:

The Soundtrack To My Life. 12/08/2011.

This week I’ve been mainly listening to bagpipes.
Bagpipes.
Bagpipes.
BAGPIPES!

How I love their strangled cat whiney out of tune sound.
It’s bagpipe season here in Glasgow and tomorrow morning I’ll be getting out of bed at 4.30am to work at the World Pipe Band Championships on Glasgow Green where there will be HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS of bagpipers strangling out of tune whiney cats for 16 hours.

It’s gonna be a long day and I’ve brought it all on myself.
I’m Scottish through and through and I don’t really mind a lone piper as long as he’s ALONE and WAY up a hill somewhere but I think that the sound of thousands of pipers tomorrow is gonna properly unhinge me 🙂

UPDATE:
I really enjoyed The World Pipe Band Championships.
It turned out to be a great day!
Also, this guy was there:

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