I turned on the T.V. today and watched 2 Rhianna videos back to back.
I’d never heard any of her music before but today I quickly discovered that she is shit!
Her music is dire!
Her music videos…Jesus Christ!
Both of her songs featured embarassing schoolgirl lyrics about how she didn’t need men in her life and how she’s a modern Woman and all that but both of the videos were full of her getting her pancake-like tits out for loads of different men.
A cheap slut on an even cheaper CGI’d beach.
Her videos look like bad adverts for package holidays to Malaga.
They could do with a gruff, stomping mad man who pulls his entire house on a rusty chain through the depths of Hell which is filled with the giant murderous skeletons of dead Nazi’s, amazing animation and creepy Great White Shark-shaped submarines.
Rhianna’s videos could definitely do with some of those things but that’s never gonna happen.
– And it doesn’t need to because the latest Tom Waits video for “Hell Broke Luce” is here and it features all of those things and a helluva lot more…